i was at work yesterday evening, shooting the breeze with a couple of co-workers. one was another black girl and the other was a really cool white guy. they were catching up on gossip around the office and started talking about how i never know what's going on around there because i only work about 20 hours a week. i usually go into the office in the evening to finish up so i can be with my kids during the day. so, i was being clueless as usual, admitting to not knowing who's sleeping with whom or who got promoted, etc, when out of the blue my friend, the white guy turns to me and says (irritatingly!) , " Black girl, does your man make THAT much damn money that you only have to work 20 hours a week?!"
i was taken aback. that's what people at work think? that we're so well off that i choose to work 20 hours a week because i have nothing better to do? i smiled and got really embarassed. flattered, i triedto pretend that my embarassment was because what he suggested was true. what do you say to that? because actually the opposite is true; my man makes just enough that we get by and those measly 20 hours i work really helps us out. in the field that i'm in, even just 20 hours make a difference. in other words, we need my "little" 20 hours.
i smiled and laughed it off and didn't try to dissuade him from thinking that. how does someone get by working 20 hours a week? the truth is, that the perception of my husband making such big money and me working only 20 hours a week because i'm a bored well -off semi-housewife is a nice thought, and honestly what i'd like people to think. actually it's mainly other black people that i'd like to think that. well, aqaintance black people who don't know me well enough to know otherwise. but i'll settle for anyone thinking that.
i married my husband because i love him. this is going to sound so wrong but here goes. now that we're married (and we've been married 10 years), i feel like there's a status thing to live up to, him being white and all. i mean, if you're a black woman married to a white guy with no money, what's the point? obviously i don't feel that way, but i know there's a lot of black people who do, like, they'd only get with someone white if he had money. why else would a black woman be with a white guy???
here's another truth: that nice, big Landcruiser(and i'm sorry but i love that thing) you people at work see me driving? pretty nice, huh? how can we afford that thing with me working 20 hours? for one thing, my husband insisted we have his dream suv. but let me put it this way. if i weren't working that 20 hours, i definitely wouldn't be rolling it. and the cost to fill it up? i wouldn't know these days, since i haven't been able to actually top it off in almost a year with the gas prices.