Friday, February 18, 2011

cringe

This Ebony issue makes me cringe:




don't get me wrong. i don't have any beef with the obamas. what i have a beef with is the the cover of ebony that says, "celebrate black love".

what exactly does that mean? just what exactly is 'black love'? is it different than white love? if my husband is white, or asian, or hispanic, can i NOT celebrate that love? i don't get it. and ebony needs to get with the times.

i have always acknowledged the social and cultural differences between white and black people. but i know for a fact, that if cosmo, or redbook or any other magazine said, "celebrate white love" that there would be some really unhappy black people making a huge stink about it. so why should ebony magazine be any different?

we are no longer living in a world where blacks are only with blacks(DUH, REALLY??!!), so why would ebony magazine suggest that celebrating black love is something that only black-on-black couples can participate in?

and is their love better than love between a white man and black woman? a black woman and an asian man, etc., etc.,...?

i don't understand why ebony can't just make the article about celebrating LOVE. regardless of what color it is.

ridiculous.

26 comments:

ISRAEL CARRASCO said...

I Mexican love this posting.

Crystal said...

Yes, yes, yes.

Noire said...

I TOTALLY agree. Been reading your blog for years now. Keep up the good work :)

Thank, Q said...

I think your point is spot-on, but wouldn't that also mean the extinction of Ebony magazine since it's a black publication? Nah, if we did that, then black people would never be seen on the magazine racks at grocery stores.

I definitely don't understand the term "black love," but I guess the term alludes to it being so rare that we have to "celebrate" it. I know. Sad that people think that, right?

Anonymous said...

Screw that! What about Plaid love? The love formed when two plaid folks get together and make plaid babies?? That's racist!!

Anonymous said...

I did not want to jump to conclusions about you so I read your post dating back to 2006 I have been blogging since then as well. I want to make a statement however I wanted to know you a little better before I did however your post have confirmed what I feared. For a woman who wants to be so color neutral all you write about is color and I really feel for you because it seems like you have become ill wanting every thing and every one not to see your color. I think the worst thing that ever happened to Africans in America is thinking they could not be themselves without asking for permission or if it was okay with someone else to feel the way the did. You may have your dream life and feel SO modern but your writing screams of a hurt little girl wanting acceptance. When the truth is you are rejecting yourself everyday. You are ethnic when it suits you, you write ridiculous things about other people of color and other people are always super cool. I challenge you to look at yourself and see if you are the racist you so hate in other people in the world and no need to call yourself a woman of color you apparently have nothing positive to say about these people and don't think to highly of them. I really know it's not your fault you were not strong enough to fight the wave of messages that always told you, you were less than. I just think you don't have to stay stuck. Maybe you should travel where to some place where people look like you and have their own culture the Caribbean or Africa you really need to find that part of you that is missing. I did not sign my name not because I was afraid of your response I left it out because this message was not to hurt you but to stop the hurt in you. it really was written in love and something all these folks that come to this site would never tell you. I think they laugh at you secretly at how much they effect your life and how tortured you are everyday. I just would like to see you find peace and acceptance in yourself and know that the world is huge and you are not judged by you skin everywhere but you have to move around to see that.

Anonymous said...

Anonymous, you need to shut up! She can write whatever the hell she wants without you feeling the need to bring your pompous a-- to her blog and attempt to "open her eyes" about shit that you may be too blind to see for yourself! Go to a country where people look like her?? I have been surrounded by freaking Nigerians for three years and every last one that I have seen, has been a hooker! Imagine how I feel. A blog is a freaking diary. If you don't like what she is writing, then don't comment! Simple as that! Now, Power to the PLAID!

TBG said...

@Anon#2:
Yes, all of my posts ARE about race, because that's what I intended this blog to be about in the beginning.
I truly don't walk around all day everyday thinking about race relations. But the times that something race related pops into my head, I blog about it. And that's why I started this blog- to blog about race when it came up. This is not a mommy blog, a finance blog, or a news blog. It's a blog specifically about race issues that come up in my world.

TBG said...

@anon#2: (cont'd)
also, this is why I don't post every day. Ever notice the time span in between posts?

Anonymous said...

Ebony is a magazine for-and-about black people. Every article, every cover, every advertisement is about black people. This month's cover is about black love. There are plenty of magazines and books about love in general, and white love specifically. THIS magazine is about black love. In a time when black marriages are at an unprecedented low, I think it IS worthwhile to celebrate black love.

TBG said...

i don't. it's attitudes like that that promote separatism and racism. it's great if black on black love is going good. however, it's not necessarily any better than interracial love or love within other races. and i don't necessarily think that Ebony is 'for' black people only. i doubt their editors would claim that.

Anonymous said...

Umm, yes, I think the Ebony editors would indeed claim that Ebony is a magazine for black people:

Ebony, a monthly magazine for the African American market, was founded by John H. Johnson and has published continuously since the Autumn of 1945.

Ebony cover photography has since its inception focused on African American celebrities and politicians. Ebony has striven always to address African-American issues, personalities, and interests in a positive and self-affirming manner. Advertisers have for decades created ads specifically for the pages of Ebony that featured black models using their products.

tbg said...

well then, fortunately the aa market has changed, and is not the same as it was in *1945*. really? it hasn't progressed since 1945? no wonder their readership is down. no wonder.

Anonymous said...

Not sure what your beef is here, TBG. Ebony is a magazine that is by blacks and for blacks, with an estimated 99% black readership. If this makes you indignant, then:

1) don't read Ebony magazine, and
2) then probably every cover and every article will make you indignant.

tbg said...

i've already stated what my beef is. see above post called "cringe" again.

Anonymous said...

Yes, I did indeed read this post. Which is why I wrote a comment.

My point is that you are complaining that a magazine geared toward black people writes cover stories about black people.

Day said...

"Ebony, a monthly magazine for the African American market, was founded by John H. Johnson and has published continuously since the Autumn of 1945."

TBG has a point, 1945 was during the Jim Crow era and there was indeed a need for such Magazines.

It is now 2011, and regardless of how much we fight to acknowledge that the social dynamics have indeed changed, it's true.

We would like change, but it seems as if there is an underlying separatist mentality among many within our community. The world is moving along, and we are remaining stagnant.

If the cover had read, "Celebrating true love" would people have read it differently? No, thus throwing the world "black" into it, serves only to exotify it and make it seem an anomaly.

Bee said...

I love that cover. Now last months issue made me cringe a little with the blurb, Is marriage for white people.

Anonymous said...

Listen, why people like TBG screaming about not getting black love celebration? Honey, this is long over do...and if you all want change, tell that to these white publication who rarely if at all show a black couples in love in thier mags. Lets keep it real. People always asking for change in black publication but NEVER take their a** over to these white publication like VOGUE, COSMO, VANITY FAIR, etc. They feature nothing but whites because it catered TO WHITES, MOSTLY. I like to see images of people who look like me. Why the hell someone has to b*tch about something thats catered to black people? And it wasn't blacks who started this seperatism in the first place. Get your fact right people!!!

TBG, GET OVER IT!!

tasnei said...

Love your blog! Don't agree with most of what you say but I like how you are able to post and write about your perceptions despite the negativity and black lash that you receive.... so anyway what is black love? I believe that it is something beautiful and needed. A lot of black kids don't grow up in a two parent household and don't believe that they would raise their kids in one either. It's more common to here "that's my future baby daddy", than "that's my future husband". So i'd say yes to anything that puts a positive light on successful black love and I think that it is great. It is the year 2011 and a lot of changes have been made, but not enough for me to say hey stop the promotion of all things soley blackness. Let's stop celebrating black history month especially since there's no white, asian, or native american months. Forget about womens month, we're pretty much equal with men now.....Anyway Ebony may not be very diverse but it's not meant to be hence the title. It's a great counter to all those other magazines that you see at the supermarket cash out with all the white faces on those covers. And as for interracial love... Kimora Lee Simmons has been on a few Ebony covers with her family. Sorry that my comment is all over the place

Anonymous said...

More and more, marriage is viewed as a 'white institution'. Black marriages are becoming much less common. Also less common is black 2-parent households. Why not have a magazine celebrate Black Love?

Prayer Notes by Cynthia said...

Did I read that Ebony is no longer a blacked-owned magazine? Could someone check this out? Just wondering. And, I love all of the back and forth. It gives me insight into the human heart and mind.

A Dangerous Mind said...

Black people have been taught not to love or care for one another and I don't see anything wrong with the cover or the title whatsoever. I can remember reading an article in which Michelle Obama was referred to as the President's BabyMama, she is not his babymama, she is his WIFE! and yes the article was written by someone who was white. For so long, black relationships were not respected or taken seriously. They were not deemed important or of having any real value. Black women were viewed as not being worthy enough to be treated as a woman should so I say keep Black Love alive and I would rather hear that slogan than I don't give a f*ck about a b*tch or I will kill every n*gga in here anyday and those slogans are acceptable to every major record label and music video channels directed toward today's youth.

Bijou Antoni said...

I never liked Ebony magazine for the fact that everything in it has to be labeled 'Black'. This is 'Black' That is 'Black' 'Black people' do this... Things like Ebony magazine and BET just perpetuate stereotypes and separate us from the rest of the world. We are all too unique to be labeled 'Black'. As for the cover, The president and first lady definitely emulate royalty and btw if you nay-sayers want to get technical; It should be headlined interracial love seeing as our president came from a white woman and black man.
-Cheers

Anonymous said...

Maybe the magazine was just trying to say that it was glad that there was finally positive media coverage of a healthy relationship between two black adults. Not because it doesn't occur, but because it's not often portrayed in mainstream media? But if that's what they meant, that's what they should have said. I am white but I think the Obama relationship coverage represents a hole in the media where there shouldn't be one.

Anonymous said...

I think it's because we're more used to see the typical two "white love", and having someone whom its race has been historically discriminate against in charge of the greatest country would be, somehow, surprising. Also, USA's population is almost entirely white, so a famous "black love" will appear less often on the media causing greater drama and thus labeling it like this.